As soon as Aqua heard this, her eyes instantly lit up. She looked at the restrained Elisha with a radiant glow. “Eh? Eh? You’re a follower of the Axis Church? There are actually believers of mine in this strange other world! I am the very goddess you worship, Aqua! Aren’t you thrilled to meet me? Aren’t you surprised?”
Archbishop Elisha’s forehead bulged with throbbing veins. “…”
“You must be so overwhelmed with joy that you can’t even speak. Of course you are! Among all Axis Church believers, meeting the goddess in person is your greatest honour. I’ll give you my blessing! I can even throw in a signed photobook!” Aqua continued excitedly, wearing the proud expression of a complete idiot.
Elisha remained silent. “…”
“Don’t just stay quiet, you’re making this goddess feel awkward! I’m a very approachable goddess, you know. Tell me any wish you have and I’ll grant it! Except lending money.” Aqua kept chattering.
“Enough!” Elisha roared in fury. What in the world was this lunatic woman claiming to be a goddess and blaspheming his sacred faith!?
He shouted at Aqua, “The deity I worship is a radiant and magnificent existence! What are you!? If you dare call yourself a goddess again, the Church will sentence you for the crime of heresy and imprison you in the underworld to suffer for eternity!”
His words stunned Aqua. She turned her head in confusion toward Ye Chui. Wasn’t this supposed to be her most devout follower?
Ye Chui hurriedly leaned in and said respectfully, “Deep down he is utterly loyal to you, but his mind has been corrupted by evil forces. Now that he’s met you, the true goddess, he doesn’t even recognise you. That’s why I summoned you—to help restore his sanity!”
“Ye Chui, you are blaspheming the divine! I will rain endless divine wrath upon you!” Elisha snarled at Ye Chui, unable to tolerate anyone mocking the gods in his presence.
Aqua, however, looked as if everything suddenly made sense. She nodded seriously at Elisha. “So that’s how it is! Then let me purify him!”
Debbie and the old emperor were dumbfounded. This goddess actually believed Ye Chui just like that? And she was going to purify Elisha?
Aqua raised her hand and fired a beam of light straight at Elisha, shouting dramatically, “Turn Undead!”
Blinding radiance filled the room, so intense that Ye Chui, Debbie, and the old emperor could barely keep their eyes open. Shock surged through them. Ye Chui was slightly better off—he knew Aqua was a genuine goddess (albeit one whose divinity was completely different from this world’s concept). Her purification and undead-repelling skills were maxed out.
But what effect would her purification have on Elisha?
When the purifying light struck him, Elisha initially felt terror, as if he truly faced a divine being. Yet he quickly realised the light caused him no harm. On the contrary… the injuries from being slammed by the fighter began to heal. Age-related ailments vanished. Even his white hair gained a few strands of black…
The sensation was so overwhelmingly pleasant, like the ultimate spa treatment, that Elisha involuntarily let out a satisfied moan.
The old emperor’s face changed drastically. “His power just surged! I… I can’t hold him much longer…” He looked at Ye Chui in frustration. “This goddess is restoring his strength!?”
Ye Chui and Debbie: “Holy crap!”
As expected from the idiot goddess!
Her purification actually healed people!!!
“My faith in the divine is unshakable! False goddess, your attacks are useless against me!” Elisha declared even more arrogantly. The fatigue that had lined his face moments ago had lessened. He bellowed at Aqua.
Aqua blinked, stunned. Ye Chui realised things were going south—this goddess’s logic was seriously flawed. He opened his mouth to stop her, but it was too late.
“Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead! Turn Undead…”
The banquet hall turned into a miniature sun. The holy light was so bright it was impossible to open one’s eyes. Inside that radiance, Ye Chui’s mind screamed a million internal curses. Damn it, spending nearly ten thousand points to summon this idiot goddess had been an idiotic decision from the start!
Bang!
The chair beneath the old emperor shattered. His plump body hit the floor with a yelp. “It’s over… The Demon-Sealing Array has been completely broken. He… he’s back to full power…”
His tone dripped with resentment. Had Ye Chui and Debbie come here specifically to help Elisha?
“Stop it right now!” Ye Chui shouted furiously, preparing to dismiss Aqua.
The white light gradually faded.
Normal lighting returned to the room. The sudden shift from blinding brilliance to darkness left everyone’s vision struggling to adjust, as though night had fallen. Ye Chui could make out Aqua panting in front of him. The blood-red runes covering the walls had vanished completely—the Demon-Sealing Array was gone!
It seemed Aqua’s purification had mistakenly treated the array as an evil force and purified it away.
Elisha now stood tall and invigorated. Though his robes were still bloodstained, all traces of injury had disappeared. His hair had turned from white to grey. He held his head high, face cold and imperious, looking down on everyone in the room.
“Damn it, I never should have summoned you!” Ye Chui finally understood the suffering Kazuma went through travelling with this idiot goddess. Even with his usual composure, he couldn’t hold back—he marched behind Aqua and punched the back of her head.
Aqua immediately crouched down, clutching her head and bursting into tears.
Then came the goddess’s legendary dramatic performance.
She rolled on the floor screaming, flailing her limbs wildly. “You told me he was my follower! I was only trying to help… It’s always like this! I just wanted to help! If you’re so great, kill me then! Waaah…”
Everyone: “…”
Right now, with Elisha restored to full power and the Demon-Sealing Array destroyed, the situation was dire—they faced the wrath of a red-robed archbishop at his peak! Yet Ye Chui, Debbie, the old emperor, and Wanda (who stood confused in the corner) could only stare at the tantrum-throwing goddess, utterly drained.
At that moment, none of them even had the energy to look tense about the impending danger…
And then—
The cold-faced Elisha suddenly dropped to his knees before Aqua. “Goddess… are you alright?”
The banquet hall fell deathly silent.
Ye Chui, Debbie, and the old emperor stared at Elisha in shock.
On his proud, aged face was genuine concern as he gazed at the goddess lying on the floor.
Uh…
“Ye Chui, what… what just happened? What was that light she kept shooting at him?” Debbie asked Ye Chui in astonishment. Only Ye Chui could understand Aqua’s words, so the others had no idea what “Turn Undead” meant.
“…”
Could it be that by healing his wounds, the goddess’s blessing had forcibly converted him into a real Axis Church follower as a side effect? (PS: Yes, this counts as a side effect!)
Looking at Elisha now, his expression still carried arrogance, but the way he fawned over the idiot goddess made him look utterly brainless. Where was the wise archbishop of moments ago?
Worshipping Aqua really did make people stupid.
Ye Chui calmly declared, “This is the goddess’s ultimate technique: Intelligence-Reducing Strike!”
“Intelligence-Reducing Strike!?” Debbie and the old emperor looked on in awe. What a terrifying power!
Elisha reverently helped the tearful goddess to her feet. Ye Chui quickly signalled Wanda in the corner. She silently moved behind Elisha, placed her hands beside his head, and wove red threads of chaos magic into his mind. Elisha’s expression turned dazed; his body stiffened.
“I can control him now!” Wanda said excitedly.
Having suffered the Intelligence-Reducing Strike, Elisha’s once-iron will was gone. He had become a complete puppet for the Scarlet Witch!
Aqua noticed Wanda’s actions and immediately grew wary. “What are you doing to my faithful follower? Stop it, I won’t allow—”
“You’re dismissed!”
Ye Chui, sweating profusely, sent Aqua back to the summoning realm. She vanished in a flash of blue light.
Ye Chui felt utterly exhausted. Though the outcome was better than expected, he decided never to summon Aqua again. She was simply too draining—who knew what chaos this idiot goddess would cause next?
Debbie helped the old emperor up. He stared in wonder at the controlled Elisha. “Elisha… is actually under control… A red-robed archbishop is the highest divine official in the Church, with unbreakable will. A thousand years ago, the strongest Saint Magister of mental magic, the Enchantress Demon, tried to control one and failed. Yet you succeeded!”
“All thanks to the idiot goddess…” Ye Chui muttered.
“So, what should I make him do?” Wanda asked.
Ye Chui gave an evil grin. “Have him go out in front of the palace and announce that the Church has always plotted to seize the Star Empire’s sovereignty, that he has killed the emperor, and that the Church will now launch an attack on the empire…”
“That would cause massive casualties!” the old emperor protested.
Ye Chui glanced at him. “I wasn’t finished.” He turned back to Wanda, his expression positively sinister. “Then invert his entire perception—make him see believers as Star Empire soldiers, and Star Empire soldiers as believers…”
…
Outside the palace, furious believers and black-armoured guards were on the verge of clashing. In fact, when Ye Chui and Debbie had crashed into the banquet hall, several believers had already attacked and been repelled. Leisha, Celestia, and the others had arrived, and huge crowds of citizens gathered, drawn by news of the emperor’s fate.
When blinding white light erupted from the banquet hall, the scene fell momentarily silent—then grew even more agitated.
Everyone watched with bated breath.
Then, Archbishop Elisha calmly walked out of the palace, his bloodstained robes seeming to proclaim a massacre had occurred.
“Your Eminence…” the believers called out in concern.
“From this day forward, the Church declares war on the Star Empire! The emperor has been slain by my hand! I will seize control of the Star Empire…” the red-robed archbishop proclaimed in a booming voice.
