“So you do mind Feifei after all…”
Zuo Zhangshi spoke, and her eyes reddened again.
Zuo Feifei kept her head lowered, saying nothing at all.
She felt both shy and hopeful.
In the past, her feelings for Jin Feng had been mostly gratitude, gratitude for rescuing her and her mother from the hellish human brokers.
Later, when Jin Feng sent many specially made wooden boxes to open the capital market, boxes engraved with poetry that instantly captivated her scholarly upbringing, she copied every verse and recited them over and over.
To her gratitude was added admiration, and a trace of something deeper.
Before, Zuo Zhangshi had only urged her privately. Now the matter had been brought into the open.
So Zuo Feifei was also waiting to see how Jin Feng would respond.
Yet who would have thought that Jin Feng would blush, stand up, bow to Zuo Zhangshi, and say, “Auntie, thank you for the meal. I have disturbed you long enough. I’m full.”
With that, he turned and fled.
Zuo Feifei had considered that he might refuse, but she had never expected him to run away in panic.
For a moment she felt terribly wronged, and tears fell in large drops.
Zuo Zhangshi, however, let out a long breath and wiped the tears from her daughter’s cheeks. “Feifei, why are you crying? Stop that.”
“Mum, what does he mean by this?”
Zuo Feifei said through her tears, “If he agrees, he agrees. If he doesn’t, he doesn’t. What kind of answer is running away?”
“Silly girl, the fact that he ran away is the best reply.”
Zuo Zhangshi smiled. “If he had agreed at once, it would mean he is a shallow man who only covets your beauty. Such a man is not worth entrusting your life to, because your beauty cannot last forever.
If he had refused outright, it would mean you are not in his heart at all, and no amount of chasing would help. So his refusal to give an answer is the best answer of all.”
“Then what should I do now?”
Zuo Feifei had no experience in love; her heart was in turmoil and she could only turn to her mother.
“He did not refuse, which means you are in his heart. He is simply hesitating. At a time like this, you need to take the initiative and cook the raw rice into cooked rice!”
“Mum~~” Zuo Feifei was so embarrassed she dared not raise her head. “What are you saying?”
“Feifei, your mother would never harm you. A husband as good as him, you will never meet another in your whole life. When you must seize the chance, you seize it!”
Zuo Zhangshi continued, “Listen to me. Tonight…”
Zuo Feifei listened to her mother’s words, her face burning red, yet she did not walk away.
At the courtyard gate, Jin Feng glanced back. His own heart was pounding wildly.
Everyone appreciates beauty. Zuo Feifei had looks, figure, and grace. To say he felt nothing would be a lie.
But when it came to romance, Jin Feng was a complete coward. Otherwise he would not still be dragging things out with Tang Dongdong.
If he were truly a lecher with no bottom line, in the Great Kang he would long since have had wives and concubines by the dozen.
He had always wavered where Zuo Feifei and Tang Dongdong were concerned.
Now that Zuo Zhangshi had laid everything bare, Jin Feng panicked and could only act like an ostrich, fleeing in embarrassment.
All afternoon he avoided Zuo Feifei. He even skipped dinner at their house and made do at the canteen instead.
Meals could be taken at the canteen, but he still had to go back to sleep.
To keep away from the mother and daughter, after eating he told stories to the children until past midnight before reluctantly returning to his room.
The moment he entered, Zuo Feifei came in carrying bedding.
“Sir, my mother asked me to bring you two new quilts. She has taken the old ones to wash.”
“Thank you for the trouble, auntie and Miss Feifei.”
Zuo Feifei kept her head down, not daring to look at Jin Feng. She carried the quilts silently to the bed and began making it.
Her mind kept replaying her mother’s words.
She wanted to be bolder, yet she could not quite let go.
The more she thought, the more aggrieved she felt, and tears began falling again.
Jin Feng had been secretly watching her the whole time.
When he saw her crying, he felt guilty and stepped forward. “Feifei, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing…”
Zuo Feifei wiped her tears and kept making the bed.
She was normally very strong. Back at the brokers she had endured such hardship that she would rather die than cry.
Yet today, for some reason, she could not stop the tears. The more she wiped, the more they flowed.
Finally she simply sat on the freshly made bed and sobbed without restraint.
Jin Feng had never seen anything like it. He flusterdly tried to dry her tears.
Feeling the warmth of his palm, Zuo Feifei’s heart suddenly grew firm.
She looked up and asked, “Sir, do you really mind me?”
“Feifei, no.”
Jin Feng hurriedly shook his head. “You are so beautiful and capable, a wonderful girl that could not be found even with a lantern. How could I mind you?”
“Then when my mother offered me to you, why did you not accept?” Zuo Feifei asked, still feeling wronged.
At this point Jin Feng knew he had to give her a proper answer, or they could not even remain friends.
He decided to be frank. After thinking for a moment he said, “Feifei, to be honest, I do like you. But I cannot possess you just because I like you. That would not be fair to you.
If one day I really marry you, it will be because I love you and want to spend my life with you, not for any other reason.”
He crouched down, looked into her eyes, and said, “Feifei, tell me what you really think.”
“I… I don’t know.”
Zuo Feifei shook her head. “Whenever I see you, sir, I feel happy. When you leave Iron Can Mountain, I feel empty inside. At night… at night I always miss you… I want to see you every day…”
Jin Feng gently placed his hands on her shoulders and gazed into her eyes. “Then are you willing to marry me and spend your life with me?”
“If you do not mind me, sir, Feifei is willing…”
Zuo Feifei answered softly.
Once a girl had said that much, even the densest man would know what to do next.
Jin Feng stood up and drew Zuo Feifei into his arms.
She trembled for a moment, then instinctively wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed her cheek to his chest.
Jin Feng stroked her hair. Zuo Feifei gave a little whimper and rubbed against his chest like a kitten.
Hearing his strong heartbeat close to her ear, all her unease and nervousness gradually melted away, replaced by a deep sense of security.
Jin Feng did not dare move, letting her hold him.
Zuo Feifei had been exhausted today, not only from arranging the new workers but from everything her mother had told her to do.
Her body was tired, but her heart was even more so.
Now that she finally felt safe, she slowly closed her eyes while still clinging to Jin Feng.
When he felt her arms loosen, Jin Feng looked down and realised the girl had fallen asleep.
“This…”
He did not know whether to laugh or cry.
What kind of situation was this, neither one thing nor the other?
Yet he could not bear to wake her.
“When you wake up, just see how I deal with you!”
Jin Feng gently pinched her nose, sighed to himself, carefully laid her on the bed, and covered her with the quilt.
