I drew my ultimate third blade for a life-or-death duel!
The spirit blade Ghost Brake!
And you pull out a giant spring onion to fight me?
This is naked humiliation!
Wei Teng’s face turned green with rage!
“Your swordsmanship is stronger than mine! But there’s no need to insult me like this!”
“Are you trying to anger me to death?”
Damn! Talking with a blade in my mouth is exhausting!
Drool is pouring out!
*Slurp~*
Jiang Nan looked deadly serious. “Nonsense! This is the EX Curry Stick! Ever heard of a holy sword?”
“Let me tell you, this onion is insanely strong! One swing and everything is bullshit! It annihilates all enemies before me!”
“This is a fight with no suspense! You should just surrender!”
Jiang Nan was losing his mind!
Hurry! Just surrender already!
I’ve already told you how broken this onion is!
Why don’t you have any sense?!
Don’t make me actually use it!
I can’t afford to lose this much face!
Right now, Xia Yao, Zhong Yingxue and everyone else had this expression: (≖_≖)
This guy’s brain must have been smashed!
You were literally eating several of these on the way here!
Now you pull one out to fight and insist it’s a curry stick…
He’s definitely an idiot!
It’s like a little girl suddenly whipping out a magic wand, claiming she’s a magical girl and needs to transform!
Hmm? Another weird analogy added to the list!
[Wei Teng’s resentment +1000!]
Fuck your curry stick!
Wei Teng’s eyes blazed, fury reaching the heavens. “Aaaaaargh! I’m taking your life!”
He charged, blades raised, speed terrifying!
Jiang Nan: !!!
I warned you so much and you still want to fight?
Do I really have no choice but to use it?
But… but!
This Holy Spring Onion Sword needs the chant and sword dance to work!
Otherwise it’s just a useless onion!
Seeing Wei Teng rushing in with murderous intent!
Jiang Nan’s little face turned beet red, eyes full of embarrassment!
He opened his mouth. “Ah~ la…”
His face exploded with redness!
How the hell am I supposed to say this chant?!
It’s even more embarrassing than Andre’s incantation!
“Stop! Stop! Stop! Hold on!”
Wei Teng skidded to a halt mid-charge, nearly spitting blood!
You can pause a deathmatch?!
“What? Changing weapons? Fine! I’ll wait!”
Jiang Nan’s face darkened. “No… just let me get in the mood!”
Wei Teng: ???
Get in the mood?! Even if you cry today, I’m still chopping you to pieces!
[Wei Teng’s resentment +1000!]
Zhong Yingxue, Xia Yao and the others stared at Jiang Nan in total confusion!
What on earth is he doing?!
Jiang Nan took a deep breath, steeling himself!
Screw it! What’s there to be embarrassed about?
If I’m not embarrassed, then you are!
After finishing his mental preparation, determination filled his eyes!
He raised the Holy Spring Onion Sword, pointing straight at Wei Teng’s forehead!
One hand on his hip!
Head tilted! Little leg stepped out!
His hips and elbows began rhythmic twisting, even his legs shaking to the beat!
He opened his mouth:
“Ah~ la sao sao! Dali di la di di~”
“La dali geng li sao~ ding dang mao~”
“Na li baba~ dali dali! Dali li li li li li li sao~ ding dang mao~”
“Dali ba li ba dai a lu!”
“Ta ba ta ba ta ba du du dai a lu!”
“Dali ba li ba dai a lu!”
“Ta ba ta ba ta ba du du dai a lu!”
…
With the chant’s rhythm! That catchy beat!
The Holy Spring Onion Sword in Jiang Nan’s hand swung and whipped in perfect sync!
The moment the chant began, everyone’s brains crashed!
What…
He’s actually singing?!
The way he’s shaking his legs? Twisting his waist? Whipping the onion?!
Pure, explosive sass! Beyond the stratosphere!
“Pffthahaha! What is this?! The Onion Swing Song?!”
“Why did Nan God suddenly pull out a giant onion and start singing the Onion Swing Song mid-fight?!”
“It’s not the Onion Swing Song! This is clearly the Dali Song!”
“Hahaha! Eh? Where’s my head?!”
“Can’t breathe! This melody is too addictive, too catchy!”
“My brain is now full of ‘la sao sao! Dali baba~ ding dang mao!’ Wait, why am I singing along?!”
“What the hell is ‘ding dang mao’ supposed to mean?!”
The moment the chant and dance came out, everyone lost their minds!
Jiang Nan’s face was steaming red!
As expected!
This is shame-explosion level!
Aaaaaah!
Is the side effect of the Holy Spring Onion Sword making you want to die of embarrassment?!
If the system could absorb shame points, Jiang Nan would have contributed ten million right now!
Right now, Zhong Yingxue and the girls’ eyes were sparkling!
Zhong Yingxue: “Kyaa~ Xiao Nan is so cute!”
Xia Yao: ꉂꉂ(ᵔᗜᵔ*)
“Gwahaha! Dali baba! You’re so sassy! I love it!”
Leng Yan, blushing: “Dali bro? I’m in love!”
Ning Youyou: “How can there be such a cute boy in this world?!”
Jiang Nan: !!!
Any real man would rather die than be called cute by girls!
You damn Holy Spring Onion Sword, give me back my youthful pride!
[Wei Teng’s resentment +1000!]
[Wei Teng’s resentment +1000!]
What the hell!
No one humiliates people like this!
Did you ever take me seriously?!
Life-or-death duel and you call for a pause?!
Then pull out a giant onion and start singing and dancing?!
I’m ~%?…;#*’☆&℃$︿!
“If I don’t kill you today, I’ll livestream myself doing a handstand and drinking from the dragon!”
“One-Slash Iai: Full Moon Slash!”
His katana drew a perfect circle, unleashing a cold moon-like blade wave!
And then, Jiang Nan moved!
Still singing: “Ah~ la sao sao! Dali di la di di~”
“La dali geng li sao~ ding dang mao~”
He dashed forward, twisted his waist, and the Holy Spring Onion Sword snapped perfectly straight!
He whipped it toward the moon slash!
A cyan sword light flashed through the air!
*Swish!*
Wei Teng: Σ(°口°|||)
His katana was sliced clean through like tofu!
The broken blade spun and stabbed into the ground!
A sword wound appeared on Wei Teng’s arm, blood spraying!
Everyone froze, rubbing their eyes in disbelief!
Holy fuck?! Is this real?!
A giant onion just casually cut through a steel katana?!
And the onion is completely unharmed?!
What kind of physics is this?!
This… this defies science!
Before anyone could react!
Jiang Nan chanted: “Na li baba~ dali dali! Dali li li li li li li sao~ ding dang mao~”
Little quick steps, spinning hip lift!
A full 360-degree spin, onion whip!
Thirteen consecutive slashes in an instant!
Wei Teng’s face changed drastically, instinctively raising his blade to block!
His remaining katana was chopped section by section until only the hilt remained!
Wei Teng stared wide-eyed: ∑(❍ฺд❍ฺlll)
He blankly looked at the hilt in his hand…
[Wei Teng’s resentment +1000!]
That was my katana!
Did you think you were slicing cucumber?!
And with a giant onion?!
Hahaha! I must be dreaming! It’s fake! All fake! Haha! Leave me alone! I’m not crazy!
This isn’t science!
Jiang Nan whipped the onion, stepped forward!
Radiant and proud!
“Dali ba li ba dai a lu!”
“Ta ba ta ba ta ba du du dai a lu!”
“Take this onion strike!”
The Holy Spring Onion Sword came down like Mount Tai!
Wei Teng could only raise his last intact katana to block!
And then…
It got chopped in half by the giant onion too!
