Zhu Ping’an looked at his uncle’s flushed face and simply smiled faintly, choosing not to expose his lie.
After all, even his uncle himself didn’t believe it anymore.
“Ahem, dear nephew, even if your salary is meager and you haven’t been able to skim any profits, your wife’s family is wealthy. As the head of the household, you can advance me three hundred taels of silver from the accounts, and I’ll repay you in a few days. Don’t worry, your uncle always keeps his word.”
Uncle Zhu Shouren still hadn’t forgotten about the three hundred taels of silver and urged Zhu Ping’an to withdraw the money from the accounts.
“Uncle, are you teaching me to live off my wife’s wealth?” Zhu Ping’an couldn’t help but laugh as he looked at his uncle.
“Ahem, what’s the difference between soft rice and hard rice? It’s all rice in your pot,” Uncle Zhu Shouren said dismissively.
Uncle, where is your face? I can’t seem to find it!
Zhu Ping’an couldn’t help but twitch the corner of his mouth. Although he knew his uncle was shameless, he was still shocked by the extent of his shamelessness.
“Dear nephew, don’t worry, I will definitely repay you. Gold will always shine. Your uncle will surely pass the imperial examination this time. Once I do, three hundred taels of silver will be nothing. I’ll repay you in a few months.”
Uncle Zhu Shouren placed his hands behind his back, striding with a confident air, his face filled with a mysterious self-assurance, as if passing the exam was as easy as reaching into a bag to retrieve something.
Gold will always shine?!
Hmph.
I think gold will always be spent by you!
Zhu Ping’an shook his head in disbelief.
Don’t you have any self-awareness about how you’ve prepared for the exam and how much knowledge you actually possess?!
“Dear nephew, your uncle is just a talent waiting to be discovered, like a thousand-mile steed that hasn’t met its伯乐 (Bole, a legendary horse tamer), which is why I haven’t passed the exam yet.”
Seeing Zhu Ping’an’s disbelief, Uncle Zhu Shouren hurriedly explained.
Bole?!
With someone like you, even Bole would castrate you and raise you as a meat horse…
A horse like you is only good for eating meat. Forget about traveling a thousand miles a day, you’d be lucky to manage ten miles. After a couple of miles, you’d be off looking for a mare to kick up your heels. You’re not even fit to be a pack horse.
“Really, dear nephew, you must believe me. The reason I didn’t pass back then was because I had no connections. The examiners were irresponsible and treated my brilliant essays like worthless grass, unjustly failing me.”
Uncle Zhu Shouren pounded his chest, attributing his failure to the lack of connections.
Zhu Ping’an had heard this excuse so many times that his ears were calloused. Whenever the topic of the imperial exams came up at home, his uncle would always come up with some reason or another to explain why he had repeatedly failed to pass the秀才 (xiucai, the first level of the imperial examination).
Lack of connections was the most frequently used excuse.
In any case, his uncle never looked for reasons within himself.
“Uncle, when I took the imperial exam, I also had no connections. In the end, the imperial exams rely on one’s own abilities.”
Zhu Ping’an said helplessly.
“That’s different, dear nephew. You are the reincarnation of the文曲星 (Wenquxing, the star of literature). How could the examiners not carefully read your essays? You’re naturally different from us…” Uncle Zhu Shouren shook his head, stubbornly arguing.
Zhu Ping’an was completely speechless.
“However, things are different now. This time, I will definitely pass the exam. Do you know why, dear nephew?”
Uncle Zhu Shouren placed his hands behind his back, looking at Zhu Ping’an with his mysterious confidence, posing a quiz.
Zhu Ping’an shook his head. Uncle, wake up! With your attitude towards preparation, it would be a miracle if you passed this time!
“Dear nephew, back then, I had no connections. But now, aren’t you the connection? With you putting in a good word for me, passing the exam will be as easy as reaching into a bag to retrieve something.” Uncle Zhu Shouren’s eyes gleamed as he looked at Zhu Ping’an.
Damn!
You really dare to think that!
Zhu Ping’an was once again astounded by his uncle’s shamelessness. There was no limit to how shameless one could be.
Hmph, so Uncle, if you don’t pass this time, are you going to blame it on me for not helping enough?!!!
Zhu Ping’an couldn’t help but laugh in anger.
“Uncle, do you know what the punishment is for cheating in the imperial exams?” Zhu Ping’an smiled as he looked at his uncle and slowly asked.
Uncle was momentarily stunned.
“It’s a capital offense, Uncle. Don’t bring about your own ruin!” Zhu Ping’an said sternly.
Uncle Zhu Shouren was silent for a moment, then laughed again. “Dear nephew, don’t scare me. It’s just putting in a good word, how could that be a serious crime?”
“Uncle, have you heard of the ‘North-South List Case’ during the Hongwu era? Also known as the famous Liu Sanwu imperial examination case.”
Zhu Ping’an asked indifferently.
“Uh, I think I’ve heard of it. Liu Sanwu was a cheating candidate, right?” Uncle Zhu Shouren scratched his head, uncertain.
You really are ignorant, Zhu Ping’an rolled his eyes. “Liu Sanwu was the chief examiner…”
“Ah, the chief examiner’s name is so rustic?” Uncle Zhu Shouren said in disbelief.
Zhu Ping’an was completely speechless.
If a modern person saw the name Sanwu and said it was rustic, that would be one thing. But you, a scholar studying for the eight-legged essay, (a style of essay writing required in the imperial examinations), actually say this name is rustic?! How did you study the Four Books and Five Classics? Do you even know how to break down the topic? How did you write your essay? It would be a miracle if you could pass the exam!
Sanwu comes from the Analects of Confucius: “I examine myself three times a day.” Such a cultured name, and you call it rustic.
“In the thirtieth year of Hongwu, during the Ministry of Rites examination, Emperor Hongwu appointed the highly respected Hanlin academician Liu Sanwu as the chief examiner, with Ji Shan and Bai Xindao as examiners…” Zhu Ping’an briefly explained the North-South List Case to Uncle Zhu Shouren.
“What were the consequences of this speculative imperial examination fraud case?! Emperor Hongwu personally sentenced Bai Xindao, Zhang Xin, and more than twenty other examiners to death by lingchi, (death by a thousand cuts); Liu Sanwu, due to his old age, was exiled to the frontier to serve as a soldier; all fifty-one selected southern candidates were dismissed, and no less than a thousand people were implicated.”
“If mere speculation led to such consequences, what do you think would happen in a real case of imperial examination fraud?!”
“The imperial examinations ultimately rely on one’s own abilities!”
Zhu Ping’an said sternly to Uncle Zhu Shouren, then warned him severely, “Uncle, do not bring this up again!”
“It’s just putting in a good word, it can’t be that serious…” Uncle said sheepishly.
“Uncle, if you spent as much effort on studying the essay and preparing for the exam as you do on scheming, you would have passed the exam long ago.”
Zhu Ping’an frowned.
“Ahem, dear nephew, as I said, you need connections to pass the exam. Without connections, no matter how talented you are, it’s useless…”
Uncle Zhu Shouren stubbornly insisted.
“Our great Ming dynasty selects nearly thirty thousand each year. Do you think they all passed through connections?” Zhu Ping’an said impatiently. “Not to mention others, in our county alone, the Wang Xiucai, Zhang Xiucai from Taoyuan Town, and the Qian Xiucai, Han Xiucai Sun Xiucai from Kaoshan Town, all come from generations of farming families. What connections do they have? How did they pass the exam?!”
Uncle had no more excuses and could only say sheepishly, “Having connections always makes things easier…”
