*Ahem*, aren’t you all being a bit too serious? “Uncle Zhu Shouren listened to their words and began to have doubts in his heart. He thought about it again; although Zhu Ping’an is honest and simple, he was quite clever as a child.
“What do you mean ‘too serious’?! Brother Zhu, isn’t everything we’ve said true?! Isn’t your nephew recognized throughout the court as the ‘Number One Memorial Deity of the Great Ming’?! Wasn’t your nephew demoted to Jiangnan after offending Grand Secretary Yan, only to rise again?! At Jingnan and under the walls of Yingtian, and at the sea sacrifice, didn’t he kill many of those Japanese pirates?!”
Xia Qiang spoke with intense emotion, almost wishing he could grab Uncle Zhu Shouren by the ear and pour the words into his head.
“Ahem, even so, even if he wants to borrow heads for training, he doesn’t necessarily need to borrow ours. He has over two thousand people in his camp to choose from. I am his own uncle; considering closeness, he can’t possibly take my head. Moreover, all three of us are well-read in the classics, a hundred times more valuable than those illiterate soldiers in the camp. Judging by usefulness, he can’t take our heads. At most, he might pick a few unlucky soldiers from the two thousand to make an example of.”
Uncle Zhu Shouren wasn’t very worried, as he truly believed what he said.
Even if his nephew wanted to emulate Sun Wu, Cao Cao, or Er Zhurong in borrowing heads, he wouldn’t borrow mine.
As long as it’s not my head, it doesn’t matter how many others die.
Therefore, Uncle Zhu Shouren remained quite calm.
“My dear Brother Zhu, think carefully about the stories of Sun Wu, Cao Cao, and Er Zhurong borrowing heads! If you think carefully, you wouldn’t say that!” Hu Wei tapped Uncle Zhu Shouren’s shoulder in frustration.
“What do you mean?” Uncle Zhu Shouren was even more confused.
Hu Wei was exasperated, rolling his eyes, “Brother Zhu, how can you still be so muddled?! When Sun Wu trained troops in front of the palace, there were two of the king’s concubines and hundreds of palace maids present. Why did Sun Wu choose the heads of the two concubines? Because their status made their heads significant enough! Why did Cao Cao take the head of the grain officer instead of a common soldier? Because the grain officer managed the provisions, making his head significant! And Er Zhurong, why did he take his nephew’s head instead of a soldier’s? Because his nephew was close to him, making his head significant!”
“If your nephew wants to borrow heads, the first one he’ll take is yours! Because you are his own uncle, your head is significant enough. The soldiers will see, ‘Heavens, even Commander Zhu’s own uncle was executed for violating military discipline,’ who wouldn’t be terrified, who wouldn’t follow Commander Zhu’s orders?! We two are just collateral, added for effect! Taking three heads is much more intimidating than taking one!”
“Er Zhurong took his nephew’s head and trained a disciplined army in one day! Your nephew taking our heads could also train a disciplined, obedient army in one day!”
“In a few days, when the Japanese pirates attack Songjiang, your nephew leading this army could achieve more military successes, and rise further in rank! It’s just a pity for us three, in the prime of our lives, full of knowledge yet to be applied, becoming stepping stones for your nephew’s military achievements, vainly contributing to his lasting fame!”
Hu Wei spoke with increasing agitation, his face growing paler, the fear in his heart enveloping him like a nightmare.
“No, no way, I am his own uncle, if he takes my head, how would he explain it to my father, his grandfather?!”
Uncle Zhu Shouren shook his head repeatedly.
Hu Wei shook his head in disbelief, not understanding where Uncle Zhu Shouren got such foolish confidence, and said helplessly, “Brother Zhu, on one hand, there’s a son who has failed exams repeatedly, not even passing theη§ζ level, a dispirited man in his forties; on the other, a grandson who has topped the exams three times, a young official of the fourth rank with a bright future. Who do you think the old man would side with?!”
Xia Qiang also chimed in, “Exactly. Besides, history is written by the victors, or at least by the living. If he takes your head, you can’t speak, and right and wrong would be his to dictate?!”
“Uh, this is all just our speculation,” Uncle Zhu Shouren hesitated, “Those common soldiers have become officials of the court, albeit military officers, but they’ve still leapt over the dragon’s gate, becoming officials.”
He was still unwilling to wake from his dream of becoming an official.
“Brother Zhu, this isn’t just alarming speculation, it’s well-founded. Your nephew has already started taking steps?!”
Hu Wei said ominously.
“What do you mean?!” Uncle Zhu Shouren’s face turned pale with fright, and before Hu Wei could speak, he started gagging, trying to vomit, “Ugh, are you saying my nephew poisoned our food?!”
But it had been a while since they ate, and all he managed to vomit was a bit of bile.
Darn!
Hu Wei covered his head, helplessly saying, “Brother Zhu, Brother Zhu, there’s no poison, and there couldn’t be. If Commander Zhu wants to take our heads, he would only do so like Er Zhurong, gathering the entire army, and executing us publicly in front of all the soldiers.”
“Whew, why didn’t you say so earlier, you scared me. If there’s no poison in the food, how has he started taking steps?!” Uncle Zhu Shouren complained, then suddenly exclaimed, “Is it a slow-acting poison?! To make us too weak to resist when the time comes?!”
Hu Wei was speechless, looking at Uncle Zhu Shouren as if he were an idiot, and said word by word, “If Commander Zhu wants to kill us, he just needs to give an order, and two thousand soldiers will act for him. Why go through all this trouble.”
“Then what did Brother Hu mean by saying he’s already started?” Uncle Zhu shook his head.
“Brother Zhu, have you forgotten our privileges? We’ve been here less than three days and have already received a month’s pay and five taels of settling-in money?! That’s not pay and settling-in money, that’s clearly blood money!!”
Hu Wei said with a pale face.
“Also, even Commander Zhu still goes to queue for meals, yet he has meals sent to us! Those aren’t meals, they’re last meals!”
Xia Qiang also added, his voice trembling, his face as white as if he had fallen into a pile of lime.
“Damn, hearing you say this, I also feel something’s wrong. Now that I think about it carefully, my nephew has never voluntarily given me money before! Even when I asked him for money, I almost never got any! Not to mention giving so much at once like today, it’s abnormal, too abnormal.”
Uncle Zhu Shouren’s face also turned pale instantly, like a monkey with a scalded butt, he jumped up and urged the two, “Then what are we waiting for, let’s hurry and leave, or it’ll be too late.”
