“Weren’t you out carousing with your cronies at Liu Bi Ju today? Usually, you don’t come back until after curfew, so why are you back so early tonight? Did something happen, you look all worked up.”
After giving Yan Shifan a piece of his mind, Yan Song tapped the table, gesturing for Yan Shifan to sit opposite him, and asked with drooping eyelids.
Yan Shifan didn’t stand on ceremony, he plopped down in the chair, grabbed his father’s teacup, and downed it in one gulp.
“What a waste, like a cow chewing peonies! Sprouts from the depths of Ling Mountain in spring, dew-drenched, slanting through the clouds on a dawn path. The immortal palm has gone unrecognised by men, lest they climb the tree and mistake it for a fleeting flower. This is the rarest of teas from Suzhou’s Tiger Hill, its yield is tiny, incredibly precious. Too scarce to be recorded by the Tea Sage in the *Tea Classic*, it’s a supreme delicacy among teas. There are only a few dozen Tiger Hill tea trees in all of Suzhou, and I’ve only got two jars of it.”
Seeing Yan Shifan gulp it down, Yan Song shook his head, lamenting the loss.
“Suzhou?! Hmph, don’t mention Suzhou to me, I get mad just hearing the name now!” Yan Shifan rolled his eyes.
“What’s Suzhou done to you?!” Yan Song asked irritably.
“It’s all because of that mess you left behind!” Yan Shifan shot back.
“Nonsense! Do you think I’m like you? I’ve only ever had your mother, where would I get a bastard from! If your mother heard this and misunderstood, got upset and fell ill, I’d never forgive you!”
Yan Song was so angry he puffed out his beard and glared.
“Zhu Ping’an! Zhu Ping’an! If you hadn’t stopped me back then, I’d have thrown him into prison with Yang Jisheng long ago! Then we wouldn’t have this mood-killer today!”
Seeing Yan Song’s beard bristling and eyes glaring, Yan Shifan didn’t dare joke around anymore and quickly spilled the beans.
“If you can’t use words properly, don’t use them at all!” Yan Song gave him an annoyed glance, then asked with drooping eyelids, “What’s Zhu Ping’an done now? Hasn’t the court already rewarded him for the Jihai victory? His Majesty approved it, so what’s gone wrong now?”
“It’s more than just a hiccup, it’s a bolt from the blue,” Yan Shifan huffed.
“Speak plainly, don’t beat around the bush, I’ve got to write a prayer for His Majesty soon, I don’t have time for your games.”
Yan Song urged impatiently.
“While we were dining at Liu Bi Ju, we heard the sound of Suzhou Prefecture’s 800-li victory report from outside the window, Zhu Ping’an’s gone and done it again!”
Yan Shifan said with a scowl, “It’s all your fault for being soft-hearted back then, if you’d listened to me and struck when we should’ve, locking him up with Yang Jisheng, we wouldn’t have this buzzkill today!”
“Back then, you were all soft, just sending him out of the capital, how’s that any different from letting a tiger loose?”
“It wasn’t a demotion, it was like sending him off to gild himself, his rank’s shot up like a crane riding a clear sky, straight to the top!”
“For the Jihai victory, we suppressed it as much as we could, spreading his merit to his family, and he still got promoted to a fourth-rank Acting Deputy Judicial Commissioner, how old is he even… And now he’s gone and done it again?! Can you believe it?!”
Yan Shifan unloaded in one breath.
“He’s done it again?”
Hearing that Zhu Ping’an had achieved another feat, Yan Song couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow, asking in surprise.
It’d only been a few days, and Zhu Ping’an had pulled off another success?! Was it that easy to rack up merits in Jiangnan these days?
Yan Song was momentarily stunned.
“What did he do this time?” Yan Song pressed.
“Protected Suzhou, wiped out 40,000 pirates!” Yan Shifan replied, enunciating each word.
“How many? How many pirates did he wipe out?” Yan Song nearly leapt from his chair in shock, incredulously asking again.
“Forty! Thousand! You heard right, 40,000, Suzhou’s 800-li victory report says Zhu Ping’an wiped out 40,000 pirates!”
Yan Shifan repeated.
Really 40,000?!
Yan Song couldn’t sit still anymore, he stood up, his old eyes sharp as a hawk’s, staring at Yan Shifan, repeating the question, “Say it again, how many pirates did Zhu Ping’an wipe out, don’t mess with me!”
“My dear old dad, what would I mess with you for, I heard it with my own ears from Suzhou’s victory messenger shouting: ‘40,000 pirate troops launched a massive assault on Suzhou city, Suzhou Prefect Shang Weichi held the interior, Zhejiang Acting Deputy Judicial Commissioner Zhu Ping’an led troops outside, their coordination was flawless, they kept Suzhou safe, Zhu Ping’an led his forces into fierce battle with the pirates, winning fight after fight, and finally crushed them in one fell swoop, wiping out 40,000 pirates, achieving a glorious victory.’”
Yan Shifan rolled his eyes, his memory sharp, reciting the Suzhou report almost word-for-word.
“40,000? You’re sure you didn’t mishear?” Yan Song still couldn’t believe it.
“My dear father, my problem’s with my eye, not my ears! You can doubt what I see, but don’t doubt what I hear! Besides, I’m repeating the exact words of the Suzhou report, no messing around,” Yan Shifan pointed to his one eye, then his ears, saying earnestly.
“Otherwise, why would I ditch the party early? Hearing Suzhou’s report felt like swallowing a fly, ruined my mood! Fine food, beautiful women, my buddies’ flattery all around, and I couldn’t muster an ounce of interest!”
Yan Shifan grumbled.
“Are Jiangnan’s pirates that easy to beat now? Wiping out 40,000 in one battle? I recall Zhu Ping’an’s Zhejiang army only has 2,000 men, right?! 2,000 wiping out 40,000 pirates?! One man taking down twenty?!”
Even Yan Song, seasoned in the storms of politics and the ways of the world, couldn’t wrap his head around this news.
“Don’t you know how tough Jiangnan’s pirates are? Haven’t we sent plenty of men down to the pirate-plagued areas of Jiangnan, pouring in manpower and funds, hoping if they scored some merits, we could fast-track their promotions, plant some loyalists in the military, and slowly gain control over the army’s voice? But what happened, almost total wipeouts, hardly anyone stood out, the silver basically went down the drain.”
“And last month, don’t you remember the news of a few dozen pirates rampaging across thousands of miles in Jiangnan, boldly storming Yingtian?”
“Pirates are notoriously fierce, reports of pirate troubles from Jiangnan flood the capital like snowflakes, every time it’s local officials losing troops and generals, victories are rare, and even then, they’re small ones, their authenticity questionable. The pirate problem in Jiangnan’s become as big a headache for the court as the northern barbarians.”
“You know all this better than anyone.”
Yan Shifan shrugged nonchalantly.
“True as that may be, wiping out 40,000 pirates in one battle is too outrageous, has the Suzhou report’s authenticity been verified?”
Yan Song asked.
“Not yet, I’ve already told Luo Longwen to go to the Office of Transmission to copy the original Suzhou victory report, you’ll see it soon enough.”
Yan Shifan replied.
“I’ve still got a prayer to write, you go summon Yan Maoqing and the others, study it, come up with a plan, I’ll join you after I finish the prayer,” Yan Song instructed.
“Got it,” Yan Shifan nodded.
