“Master, the menu for the victory banquet is ready. As you instructed, it features delicacies from mountain and sea, fowl and beast all represented. Since Lord Hu hails from Jixi in Anhui, I have arranged a hometown dish for him, stinky mandarin fish. I guarantee Lord Hu will taste home in a single bite. Please review it, Master.”
Just as Zhao Wenhua was laughing in extreme fury and the steward shrank his neck like a quail, the fat head chef from the kitchen came in with a list, seeking credit.
This menu had cost him no end of brain cells. It was luxurious yet refined, high-class yet approachable, delicious, and it showed Zhao Wenhua’s special regard for Hu Zongxian. He had even included stinky mandarin fish.
Making stinky mandarin fish was no easy task, and the ingredients were hard to source. He had scoured the city for Anhui cooks and gone to great trouble to obtain five fish. They smelled foul but tasted fragrant, a flavour all their own.
The fat head chef, pot-bellied and bowing low, presented the victory banquet menu with both hands for Zhao Wenhua’s approval.
Smack.
Zhao Wenhua took the menu, flew into a rage, crumpled it into a ball, and hurled it hard into the chef’s plump face.
The chef was struck dumb, his mind froze, his small eyes filled with bewildered stupidity.
What on earth?
What had he done wrong?
What had happened? Why was the master suddenly so furious with him?
“A menu worth bothering me with? My energy is for matters of state and military, not kitchen trifles. Cannot you see I am occupied with affairs of state? Get out, now.”
Zhao Wenhua’s face was black as he pointed at the door and cursed the fat chef roundly, ordering him to scram.
“Yes, yes, yes. This servant was blind to disturb the master with affairs of state.” The fat chef looked wronged and hurt, but having risen to head chef in the Zhao household, he knew how the world worked. He nodded and bowed as he backed out.
Once outside the study, he felt numb, utterly baffled. What was going on? Only half an hour earlier, Zhao Wenhua had specifically told him to prepare the victory banquet properly, to let Hu Zongxian taste his special favour through the meal, and even emphasised that the chef should bring the finished menu for his review.
How could the master have forgotten his own words in just half an hour?
The fat chef racked his brains to no avail. He could not understand why the master had reacted like this.
Had his embezzlement from kitchen purchases been discovered?
It should not be. Though he had skimmed several thousand taels from the kitchen, he had covered every transaction carefully.
For instance, this time with the stinky mandarin fish. Each fish cost fifty taels, and he had pocketed forty, but the receipt showed fifty taels, signed and thumb-printed by the Anhui cook himself.
He had even given the Anhui cook a five-tael kickback. The cook, now connected through him, was so delighted he nearly called him father.
The cook would never report him.
Then why? Had that wretched girl Xing’er reported him for molesting her? Impossible. Though he had made her service him in the kitchen a few times, she had received his tonic recipes in return. It was entirely consensual. Those recipes were said to come from palace secrets. Since she got them, Auntie Liu’s breasts had grown larger, the master visited Auntie Liu more often, the effects were excellent. Xing’er had even been promoted to first-rank senior maid. Reporting him would gain her nothing. Once reported, she would never survive in the inner courtyard. The courtyard had no place for a tainted girl.
Then why?
The fat chef’s head ached terribly, but he could not leave it unclear. If he accidentally provoked the master again, he might not even know how he died.
Suddenly he thought of the steward in the study. An idea formed. He went to the corner on the path from study to front courtyard and waited.
Soon, after about the time to drink a cup of tea, the fat chef saw the steward hurrying through the cold wind, wiping sweat.
“Brother.”
The fat chef reached out, grabbed the steward’s hand, and pulled him over.
“Ah?”
The steward opened his mouth, but the fat chef clamped it shut. “Brother, it’s me, Chef Wang.”
“Damn it, Fatty Wang, you scared me to death. I was already jumping at shadows, and you pull this stunt.”
Seeing it was the fat chef, the steward relaxed. Once his mouth was free, he began cursing.
Earlier he had crouched like a quail, terrified. Fortunately he had emerged unscathed.
“Brother Zhang, Brother Zhang, my dear brother. It was my fault for startling you. This small token is nothing, just to settle your nerves.” The fat chef pulled a fifty-tael banknote from his breast, thought for a moment, then drew another fifty-tael note from his sleeve. He folded them together and pressed them into the steward’s palm.
The steward glanced at the two fifty-tael notes, and his face broke into a broad smile. “Oh come now, between brothers, this is too much. No more of this, no more, really. You are too polite.”
As he spoke, the steward tucked both notes securely into his own breast. His attitude toward the fat chef warmed considerably.
“Dear brother, your little brother has a favour to ask.” The fat chef said fawningly.
“I know. You want to ask why the master lost his temper with you, right?” The steward saw the chef’s expression and guessed immediately.
“Yes, yes, yes. That’s exactly it. Worthy of Brother Zhang. No wonder you are the steward.” The fat chef nodded repeatedly, leaned close, and whispered, “It was clearly the master who told me to bring the menu for his review once ready. I do not know how I touched his sore spot. Please advise me, Brother Zhang, so I do not unwittingly provoke him again and cause trouble for you.”
“Let me tell you, you can stop that victory banquet for now. Unless the master orders it, do not take the initiative.”
The steward whispered.
“Ah? Why?” The fat chef looked shocked.
“Why else? A victory banquet celebrates what?” The steward glanced at him.
“Victory, of course. What else would a victory banquet celebrate?” The fat chef blurted.
“If there is no victory, do we still celebrate?” The steward looked at him, lowered his voice, and asked calmly.
“Ah?” The fat chef’s mouth fell open.
“Hu Zongxian suffered a major defeat at the front. Two in a row…” The steward lowered his voice further and warned, “Do not spread this. Just keep it in mind.”
“Ah. So that’s it. No wonder, no wonder. Thank you, Brother Zhang. I understand now. Rest assured, your brother’s mouth is sealed tight.” The fat chef suddenly saw the light.
